Nopes! I am not referring to the 1996 R Kelly song! It's a dream I was "made" to dream in the spring of 2005! I put in more efforts, to prove a point, to prove that I deserved. But none of that was considered!
It was way back in 2005, that I decided, I was too bugged with work! Well, that wasn't a difficult decision I know! I decided to quit (as though it was a bad habit ruining my life!)... Go to a higher knowledge space... I decided (again!!!) that I must speak to the competitive authority about it and I did. He appreciated my will to push forward, but least did I know then that my eyes will be blinded from the truth; that I will be tied up with a hope to fly sky high... with a dream to fly to the United States!!!
But, it wasn't long before then that I confronted the truth. It was as hard as a rock to digest! I wasn't to fly! But it was too late for me to face the truth and I wasn't prepared at all! Tumultuous agony... MAYHEM days were staring at me! Had nothing to look back... Nothing! I didn't have any choice left but to face the days like a brave warrior. The support I sought earlier was no more there. Life, as I used to call her then, had quit me and moved on; and I missed her in those days, when I sought her support the most! The days were getting harder to get through, and the nights even difficult to sleep through. I did not dare to dream again! I felt like a weak old blind man without his walking stick!
Days passed by and time kept ticking, as it never does stop for anyone. I did not have a clue, if it would end! Resolutions, kept losing my sight, far beyond my reach! The only thing that I could see was a hope, hung by itself - not in my reach but within my sight, to which I had to hang on to. But for how long - Unanswered! No one seemed to know! If I cut lose my grip on the hope, I feared of falling from a cliff so high! I was trying to hold on... but kept losing the strength!
"The sun shall shine, the clouds shall bring rains, the grasses shall remain green and thou, my Lord, shall always be worshiped"! Sounds like brave optimistic words. But I don't know for how long these words would mean the same to me! Shall be seen...
4 comments:
Hey bro..i have learned one thing in my life..Watever happens, happens for the good only. You may not realize it today but someday down your line you will surely realize that it was only for your good only and at that point you will thank God. As it is said "You can always connect the dots by looking backwards but you Cannot connect them looking forward."
dude.
hope. cling on to it. not a far cry from ur dreams being realised.
as far as i know u, su wil triumph.
and u do hav support to seek.
its only u who has to reach out and grab it.
"...and thou, my Lord, shall always be loved..."
Thus spake Benitri to her Lord Hortico, when he sat in silence, his thoughts circling his head like little winged demons.
Hang on. Walk on. And you will rise higher than ever before.
Love,
Benitri.
you should write some more. Let me quote Rocky Balboa:
"Let me tell you something you already know. The world ain't all sunshine and rainbows. It is a very mean and nasty place and it will beat you to your knees and keep you there permanently if you let it. You, me, or nobody is gonna hit as hard as life. But it ain't how hard you hit; it's about how hard you can get hit, and keep moving forward. How much you can take, and keep moving forward. That's how winning is done. Now, if you know what you're worth, then go out and get what you're worth. But you gotta be willing to take the hit, and not pointing fingers saying you ain't where you are because of him, or her, or anybody. Cowards do that and that ain't you. You're better than that!"
it is a battle. fight.
from what i know...life is a bitch. be the dog.
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